An Anniversary
Originally written June 20th, 2006:
Recently, an anniversary passed. 13 June was eight years since I moved to England. No, I have not been celebrating. That anniversary always precedes another one. Today, the 20th of June, would be my eighth wedding anniversary...if I was still married. Maybe that accounts for my not so happy mood.
The book I am currently reading probably doesn't help. It's by the guy who wrote, "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus," John Gray, and is called, "Mars & Venus: A Match Made in Heaven." It explains how most couples have problems caused by the different ways men and women communicate, deal with stress, and differ in needs. In reading it, one thing is perfectly clear: my marriage could have been saved. There wasn't an unbridgeable gulf between us. Well, I never thought there was. At the time, I asked my evil ex-wife to try counseling with me, but she refused. This book makes it clear that had she not refused, we could have overcome our difficulties and might still be together. I wish she had read it, back then.
It probably didn't help that someone I have wanted to have a relationship with, for the past eleven months, last night unceremoniously annouced that she had started dating someone. Since I hadn't known anything about it, it obviously wasn't me. What is bothersome about this is that when I suggested that she and I have a relationship, she told me she didn't want a relationship...with anyone. Well, that obviously wasn't true. Recently, she told me that she now realized she does want a relationship with someone, but lamented that things haven't been working out with any of the men she has gone on dates with. I reminded her about me and suggested that she might be looking in the wrong place. After all, why chase after men who are only moderately interested, when there is someone you already know who fancies you? I had hoped I had made an impression. Apparently not.
The first, thing about this is that it leads one to think, "what's wrong with me?" But beyond that, I guess what really feels bad is that, despite me making it quite clear, on several occasions, over the past 11 months, how I feel about her, the way she told me made it clear that she didn't even consider how I might feel about the news. It just didn't occur to her that I might be bothered. Surely, it didn't help much that this news was sprung on me on the eve of my wedding anniversary.
I apologize if this edition of my blog isn't as light hearted as it usually is. I am sure I will be back to normal soon. Sorry.
Recently, an anniversary passed. 13 June was eight years since I moved to England. No, I have not been celebrating. That anniversary always precedes another one. Today, the 20th of June, would be my eighth wedding anniversary...if I was still married. Maybe that accounts for my not so happy mood.
The book I am currently reading probably doesn't help. It's by the guy who wrote, "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus," John Gray, and is called, "Mars & Venus: A Match Made in Heaven." It explains how most couples have problems caused by the different ways men and women communicate, deal with stress, and differ in needs. In reading it, one thing is perfectly clear: my marriage could have been saved. There wasn't an unbridgeable gulf between us. Well, I never thought there was. At the time, I asked my evil ex-wife to try counseling with me, but she refused. This book makes it clear that had she not refused, we could have overcome our difficulties and might still be together. I wish she had read it, back then.
It probably didn't help that someone I have wanted to have a relationship with, for the past eleven months, last night unceremoniously annouced that she had started dating someone. Since I hadn't known anything about it, it obviously wasn't me. What is bothersome about this is that when I suggested that she and I have a relationship, she told me she didn't want a relationship...with anyone. Well, that obviously wasn't true. Recently, she told me that she now realized she does want a relationship with someone, but lamented that things haven't been working out with any of the men she has gone on dates with. I reminded her about me and suggested that she might be looking in the wrong place. After all, why chase after men who are only moderately interested, when there is someone you already know who fancies you? I had hoped I had made an impression. Apparently not.
The first, thing about this is that it leads one to think, "what's wrong with me?" But beyond that, I guess what really feels bad is that, despite me making it quite clear, on several occasions, over the past 11 months, how I feel about her, the way she told me made it clear that she didn't even consider how I might feel about the news. It just didn't occur to her that I might be bothered. Surely, it didn't help much that this news was sprung on me on the eve of my wedding anniversary.
I apologize if this edition of my blog isn't as light hearted as it usually is. I am sure I will be back to normal soon. Sorry.
posted by Joey B at 6:52 PM
.jpg)
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home