Friday, December 29, 2006

The Whistle Lost Its Magic

On Wednesday night, M1 and the Exotic Flower came home late. Nando had already gone to bed and I had fallen asleep in front of the TV. The nap did me good, because I was able to rouse myself to spend some time with the Flower. As she had given M1 a new DVD player for Christmas, he's given his old one to "the house." I got Nando to connect it to the TV in the lounge and we had tried to watch "The Da Vinci Code," earlier, but I fell asleep. Nando has seen it before and as he was feeling ill, he went to bed.
M1 and the Flower prepared a meal for themselves. They had bought some microwavable stuff and a cooked chicken. The Flower offered me the wings, because they don't eat them. I'm not one to turn down free food. She gave me some Brussels sprouts as she didn't want them. I also ended up with a couple of pieces of roast potato, as M1 didn't want them. I swear they weren't fully cooked, although the two microwave chefs swore they were. As they sat down to eat, I thought this was the perfect opportunity to show "them" the short film I was in, over the summer. The original title was "The Magic Whistle," but the filmmakers shortened it to "The Whistle" by the final edit. It was an entry into the 48 Hour Film Challenge and came in sixth. When I say, "them," it was really the Flower who I wanted to see it. I couldn't give a monkey's if M1 saw it, or not. I hoped she would be impressed to see me on the screen. I have lines and a credit, as well. It's the first film I wasn't just an extra in.
While they were preparing the food, I had nipped upstairs and got my DVD of "The Whistle." As they started munching their food, I put it on. "This is the short film I was in," I said. M1 started talking to the Flower about some nonsense, so I warned her, "I'm in the first scene." The first glimpse of me is in the background of a shot.
"Is that you?" she asked. No, it's George Bush. Of course it's me. Then my big moment comes on, with my two lines. M1 laughs at the one I improvised. That's okay, it's supposed to be humorous. After my scene, their attention drifts back to the roast chicken, potatoes, and sprouts.
As the rest of the films plays, M1 shouts out, "this is crap," a couple of times. I could do without that. As the credits roll, he is perplexed. He doesn't get it. Well, maybe if he'd paid more attention, he could have figured the story out. To stop his moaning, I explain it to them. My name is the third one in the credits of the cast. The Flower's reaction is a bit flat. What does it take to impress this chick? A load of hair gel, like he wears?You won't ever see your simpleton of a boyfriend in a film. They want to know what's on Sky. I put on "Spanglish," with Adam Sandler, for them. I eat the rest of my meal while they watch the beginning of "Spanglish." They enjoy this film. The savages are easily entertained.


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